Wednesday, 6 February 2013

Rate Naija: Hot Chocolate, Milkshakes & Icecream


Having had THE BEST HOT CHOCOLATE LIKE EVUHHHH in THE BEST GADDEM CITY IN THE WORLD (Rome, Italy) 2 summers ago, I had since despaired of ever tasting anything of the like again.

And then…now, don’t get excited, I didn’t exactly find a replacement but I sure as heck had me the best hot chocolate ever in Nigeria at *drumroll* the self-service mini-Café Royal at the top of the Palms in Victoria Island Extension.

My girl had called me up a couple Sundays ago to hang out and have a quick drink. It was the perfect weather – cool with a light drizzle after a thunderstorm much earlier that morning. We decided on the café and went in with zero expectations.

By the time we settled down and had our orders taken, the expectations had dropped to the minus range due to the crappy attitude of the staff. We were 0.00008 tantrums away from pitching a fit and yelling for a manager. The hot chocolate arrived with no fanfare, and I had resigned myself to enduring a cup of Milo dressed up as something else but then…what is this BLISS spreading itself across my tongue??!

I immediately put down my cup and blurted out my amazement before greedily reaching out for more. It was lovely! The evening was just lovely, really – hot girls, hot chocolate, hot gossip…can I just say I love my life? Thanks.

Good hot chocolate (rated 4.3 stars out of 5) exists in Lagos, y’all! Stop by and get you some (you might need holy water on hand to deal with the joke of a staff though).

P.S.A. for the future husband - I’d totally love to be proposed to over a hot steaming cup of hot, sweet chocolate in a quaint café in the corner of the winding old street on a cool, autumn evening in Rome…

…………………..

…Not that I’m fussy or anything……………………….. -__-

Bonus – Many hearts were broken with the dearth of the famous New Yorker restaurant chains. They had the best pizzas and milkshakes of life way back when in Lagos city. Finding a good ol’ milkshake became the real mission impossible after they exited stage left. The best you could get if you asked for say, a vanilla milkshake, was whipped Peak milk.

Well, Johnny Rockets, 1411, Adetokunbo Ademola St., Victoria Island, is here to fix that shit. THICK, THICK, THICK, FATTENING, SWEET-ASS, DID-I-ALREADY-SAY-THICK milkshakes (rated 4 stars out of 5). Lord God. I’m a sucker for the Oreos Cookies-and-Cream shake. Heaven is here on earth sometimes. If you’ve yet to stop by, you need to get your life.

Bonus, Bonus – The introduction of Coldstone Creamery, 4, Saka Tinubu St., Victoria Island, must have had Ice-cream Factory scrambling and doubling up on their juju to get their customers back. I mean, what else can explain the joke Coldstone Creamery has become these days? I’ve been there repeatedly since the month of December only to be told they only have 2 flavors – vanilla and chocolate. The hell????

First off, how do you not have the exotic flavors and mixes that are the crux of your business??? And you pull that during the prime peak season that is Christmas??! A joke, I say! It’s a far cry from the fanfare with which they burst onto the scene. I was going to do a review on them when they first opened but seeing as they would not be rated anything better than 0 stars out of 5, I’m not going to waste my time until they triple up on their own juju.

L.

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